Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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