i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Send help, water and tortillas.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I just had sex on a roof
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Randomize
