Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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