I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Randomize
