Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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