I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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