Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
she looked like the before picture.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
