Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
"I'm a professor to university students" I say as I realize I have a nipple piercing that I have no memory of getting
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Randomize
