Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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