You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
