Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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