I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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