Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize