do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
