im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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