I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
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