He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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