i don't like sucking hair
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Randomize
