I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
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