Whoa Z and x make the same sound
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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