I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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