I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Randomize
