Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize