Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
