i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
