apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
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