he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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