i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
dude i'm inner monologue high
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
