ugly people sure do ruin things
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
