i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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