I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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