Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
I say "glasses of whiskey" like I didn't chug it out of the bottle
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Randomize