OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Randomize
