You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize