Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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