It's like God shit irony all over that family
I wish i was in the wii world.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Randomize
