Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
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