I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Randomize