Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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