my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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