i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
