i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Randomize
