we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
