She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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