I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
