And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize