Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I'm always down for nudity.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
