Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
