Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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