my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
