i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
