I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
